Wednesday, May 7, 2025

OPENING FAIRLY SOON!

The All-New and Improved
 TRUMP 
ALCATRAZ TOWER
President Trump announced this week that he has ordered the complete renovation of Alcatraz to a fully-operational federal prison. 

It will be spectacular! The first view a new convict will see upon stepping out of the ferry from San Francisco will be the sign over the main entrance in 40-foot high letters that read: "TRUMP ALCATRAZ TOWER. "In smaller, but easily read letters, it will read, "This site was developed and constructed by - and some cells are proudly reserved for - Donald J. Trump and Family"

It will be a proud moment when the Alcatraz Tower is finally open for convicts and visitors. You are cordially invited to stop by, mingle with the inmates, browse the gift shop and enjoy a delicious meal at the "Mobster's Lobster Dining Room!"

The Trump Family will stop in on special ocassions. Photos with any or all of the family members are $2,500. each.  And for an extra $125,000. you will receive a newly-minted gold-plated lapel pin of the image of Donald J. Trump, himself!

Ride over in the S.F. Ferry - Ride back to S.F. (if you're lucky.)












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